My Embarrassing Monday

I had a very embarrassing day at work today, because it was a Monday. I will explain what happen today in order of embarrassingness:

1. I was delivering an envelope downstairs to a box that I don't really understand (I don't know where it goes or what it's for), but I always have to deliver papers there. I was walking by a desk and I heard a woman say, "you're my hero!". I knew this woman because I had talked to her once or twice on other, similar errands, so I turned around and laughed and said "thank you!" before realizing that she was on the phone. 

2. I went back that office ten minutes later because I had to deliver another paper to the same box, and when I was leaving, that same woman asked me if I needed the registrar's box, and I said no, and so she asked me what I was doing. "I'm here to put the paper in the box," I replied wisely. 

"That's the registrar's box," she said. 
"Oh," I said. "Then yes, that's what I was doing."

3. Later, I had to buy something from the bookstore for my department, and when I was signing the receipt with the name on the department credit card, I thought I was writing my last name for a minute, and the end result was what looked like a fifth grader writing MCONMA and a squiggly line for the last name (I didn't even bother thinking up letters for that part). The woman asked me if I wanted another receipt to sign, and I said yes please, but then I realized that she was kidding, so I pretended like I was, too.

4. Then, I had to deliver a form to the VP's office, so I went up there, and on the way out, I always pick up a piece of chocolate from the candy bowl that's always on the receptionist's desk. I reached out to take the candy, and my hand hit the table. I looked down to realize that the bowl wasn't there today, and I had just reached out to grab at an empty space on the desk. The woman behind the desk gave me a polite look and asked if I wanted the candy, and I kind of turned red and nodded and ran off. (I later realized that words would have been involved in the better response)

5. Finally, when I was heating up my lunch during my lunch break (still in my department office) I tried to open the microwave door, and I pulled the microwave off the counter and it fell on the ground. I picked it up and put it back and plugged it back in before anybody noticed, because thankfully, the people in the rooms closest to me were either on vacation or on lunch. The next woman to heat up her lunch had a little bit of trouble getting the microwave started, but I just sat at my computer and concentrated on writing, looking very innocent and oblivious. The microwave, in the end, did finally start.

Anyway, so now that I have been sufficiently humiliated, I think I will go home and sit down for a while and eat some expensive dark chocolate with Mayan spices and a hint of orange.